I had Helea, my blood elf paladin, healing for awhile. Recently, though, I came to the conclusion that I just don’t care, and therefore, the stress occasioned by the large numbers of new, squishy bear tanks encountered with Dungeon Finder was just not worth it. I like living as much as the next soul, but for me, healing is a just means to that end – and it’s something that somebody else can do. It only makes me feel things like “meh,” “okay, I guess,” and “well, somebody’s gotta do it.” Now that I think about it, there’s probably not enough explosions in it. How the hell did I get Ailabeth (my former priest) to 80?
Helea actually spent at least ten levels healing while in Prot spec before I realized that it really didn’t make much sense for a healer to have Avenger’s Shield. Wait, hold on, why does she have Avenger’s Shield? Oh! Look at that, Helea’s in Prot. What am I doing!?
Upon entering Gnomeregan for the nth time (and still in Protection because that’s how much I care), Helea was greeted with a “hello sexy little blood elf.” If she could’ve shot green lasers out of her eyes, she probably would have. Helea is certain that there’s a time and a place to be /flirty and meet guys, and Gnomeregan isn’t it. It’s covered in leprous gnomes and irradiated cockroaches! Ew, no! Bad date! Bad! (Side note: I think most of the goblin girls would be like, “BEST DATE EVER. Here, I’ll let you kill one of those ostrich thingies. WHEE!”) After struggling to level 27, she left Gnomeregan, went shopping, and had a hissy fit when she could find nothing that matched her new damn pants!
Meanwhile, Niremere-the-Paladink hit 40, obtaining plate and a unicorn! Why was being a paladink so much more awesome on Niremere than Helea? Since I’m asking this, why am I playing a blood elf? This is me, Prinnie! I am about as blood-elfy as a … as a … squirrel is. What am I doing!?
If you just guessed “Prinnie probably deleted Helea and made another goblin,” you’d be so on the money.
Introducing Ebixxie Kylala (that’s pronounced “kill-lah-lah,” preferably in a sing-song tone), shadow priest. Ebixxie looks forward to studying the process of brain implosion and whether or not awareness of impending brain implosion affects how it works. In order to do this, she needs to set up a study of at least 1,000
victims participants, of whom half will have their brain imploded at random without any sort of warning, and half will know what’s coming. What do you mean, this isn’t a good study? It’s very well designed!
This means that each and every single one of my Hordies is now a goblin. In all, the goblinization process took one year.