Alliance #&*%ery

While I’ve played Horde ever since I started WoW, I have a number of Alliance-inclined on my reading list here, and I decided I’d try to get a little more of the Alliance picture.  While Sun is gone, I can’t play Mahanth.  (She’s my wee little Draenai hunter with a back problem.)  So I elected to make a human, since they start closest to Stormwind, which I wanted to explore.

This was probably dumb.  I should’ve made a dwarf.

Enter Niremere, who may or may not have a problem with the Azerothian equivalent of Botox, since she can’t move her face.

Niremere

I leveled her out of Northshire Abbey, through Goldshire (I find the presence of so many low level female night elves suspicious) and am now doing tasks for random souls in Stormwind.  I decided to visit the Keep while I’m at it, to see this big Varian Wrynn guy … who turned out to be literally enormous. (And also surrounded by a sheeyitload of guards.  I’m not surprised every group out of Orgrimmar wipes.)

Varian Wrynn Gets His Angryface On

Varian Wrynn Gets His Angryface On

So far, I can handle the random guys dancing with me.  Sure, I’ll /dance.  (Secret: when I was a kid, we had to learn the Macarena in gym class.  I don’t know what they were thinking.)  I’m a little weirded out by the guys like this:

Uh, Okay Then

Uh, Okay Then

… but I can cope. It’s the ones like this:

Kill It With Fire

Kill It With Fire

… that make me wonder why the hell am I doing this?

I should probably just state right out that I hate rape jokes and I have zero sense of humor when it concerns rape.  I find this behavior off putting at best and downright trucked up in general, and I’m horrified that in under an hour of playtime my character has been subjected to this kind of sheeyit.

I’m well aware that this is not something new.  I’ve played female characters in every MMO I’ve ever been in, but at least the Korean guys following me around and asking me in broken English to be their girlfriend had that kind of awkward cuteness going for them.  This is just messed up.

I don’t want to just ditch the whole damn Alliance because of a handful of low level male morons, but this sort of thing makes me angry enough to consider 1.) learning how to PvP, and 2.) griefing low level male morons, preferably while wearing full plate.  Interestingly, I haven’t had an single incident of this sort of stupidity while leveling Helea, my blood elf, in skimpy outfits (or in fact, for any of my Hordies, ever).  For the Horde!

Anyone Alliance on Wyrmrest who wants to keep me company and/or punch the jaw off some of these lowlifes for me?  Let me know.

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14 thoughts on “Alliance #&*%ery

  1. clumsygrrrl

    Ugh, rape jokes. You and I are one in the same. I have ripped people to shreds in Vent for making rape jokes and not understanding why they aren’t funny.

    I would LOVE to keep you company if you were on Malfurion! I actually find it super hard to navigate Horde cities … so I stick to Alliance, haha!

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Dood Post author

      In turn, I can’t navigate Stormwind to save my life. Do you know how long it took me to get to the darn Keep? Holy crap! Why are these buildings here? It looks like there’s a path on the map, but maybe that’s not a path on the map. Why is there this canal? Oh God! I’m never going to get out of town ever again!

      Reply
      1. clumsygrrrl

        haha EXACTLY my problem with Orgrimmar! I’m wandering up and down thinking, “Where IS the bank? Do I go up a ladder? Cross a bridge? AHHHHHH”

        Reply
      2. Leit

        Stormwind seems to be a pretty good representation of a medieval castle city. Which means it looks like it was in no way, means or form planned, and has several layers of walls where defenses would have made sense when the place was smaller, and paths are more determined by where people dropped their houses than by access to servces, and and and…

        Which is all super cool, *except*… there’s this whole storyline about how SW was completely rebuilt by the Defias a few years back, and said Defias got totally stiffed and decided to settle the bill with extreme firepower. Not being goblins, they obviously failed, but… couldn’t they have slipped in a few upgrades while rebuilding? >.<

        My solution: Ironforge. Quick trip down the railway from SW, everything's in a huge circle so you can use the tried-and-true Undercity "just keep going 'til you see it" nav method, and no Goldshire.

        Reply
  2. Hooves

    Sadly I do think a lot of lower leveled people come in to troll the server. Like, they’re not permanent members of the server, they just think /e is funny, and they’re trying to be “clever”– by ‘clever’ I mean, “douchewaffles”.

    But of course you can always hit up my toons if you’re in need of dungeons or anything WrA Ally-side. 😀 I have some baby characters.

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Dood Post author

      Sadly, it just really effs up the whole starting experience. Except for the first three levels where she was killing worgs, she’s been followed around/creeped on/and the above. It reinforces my personal belief that the internet is where average people attempt to one-up each other and wind up degrading a bunch of sheeyit in the process.

      I may need help with sanity Alliance side, if I can keep going. Maybe I should reroll Niremere so she can wear plate later on in life. (I also gotta say, the dress she’s got now does not do a damn thing for the poor girl’s figure.)

      Reply
  3. tomeoftheancient

    That is definitely a worthwhile reason to become a PvP master. What are people raising? In defense of the Alliance the worst anyone’s ever done on Fenris is /lick me. Oh, and long ago one character followed me around repeatedly asking if I was a “real” girl.

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Dood Post author

      I usually try to avoid the stupidity because stupidity just can’t be killed. But sometimes, the thought of smashing some asshole into the ground is really super duper tempting.

      Reply
  4. Leit

    Human females just have these “deer-in-headlights” expressions and completely unconvincing poses. You get the impression there’s someone standing just offscreen wearing a skin mask and chanting “it wears the armour or it gets the hose again”…

    Now, for a certain kind of creeper, that apearance of apprehension and vulnerability is going to look a lot like blood in the water. Which is hella creepy on its own private level.

    Suspect belves don’t get the same because, when it comes down to it, any horde female *owns* wherever she’s standing. Even if they do look like stitched-together drinking straws, female blood elves keep a solid frame and, most often, a severe and self-assured expression.

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Dood Post author

      When I remade Niremere, I tried to choose a more 😡 face than I had before (the first time, I chose a face that stared gracefully and vacantly off into the void). This + pants + enormous weapon + better timing* probably has enabled me to get from 1 to 16 without being harassed. Thank Gawd!

      * Better timing = ungodly hour because cats woke me up way too early

      Reply
  5. Pingback: Project Platekini Part 1: “Dark Embrace” Set | That Was an Accident!

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