Becoming One With the Derp

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Let your worries flow from your body, and allow yourself to become one with the derp.

Or more accurately, level a DPS to 90 and then you’ll BE the derp, thanks to the amount of time spent traipsing around in Pandaland by your lonesome.  Blingtron being everywhere you go doesn’t faze you, but you’re startled when people actually say things out loud in the Shrine.  You’re jaded and you’ve lost your patience.  (I’m just telling you, those mother trucking hyenas were ASKING to die!  They should’ve just let me skin their buddy in peace!)  You wonder if that jerk of a questgiver really gave you all the quests he had, or if he’s just going to send you back to almost the same dang spot for something else.  Wait, were you there before?  You’re not sure anymore.  It’s all blending together … ding!  Level 90.  Clarity of derp achieved.

Some people craft gorgeous, useful jewels.  Some people engineer creative devices.I derp.

Some people craft gorgeous, useful jewels. Some people engineer creative devices.
I derp.

In all, Alexalis followed the same pattern established by my ninety million alts already in Pandaland:

The Pandarian JourneyI hear people quest in that Krasarangarang place.

The Pandarian Journey
I hear people quest in that Krasarangarang place.

  • Land in the Jade Forest.  Cue the pandas and Sha.
  • Leave the Jade Forest ASAP, because hozen.  Virmen take the stage.
  • At level 87, realize I can totally go to Kun-Lai Summit now and there’s a 24 SLOT BAG there! Hell yeah!
  • Decide to open up the Eternal Vale first in order to hearth at the shrine, since the return portal from Org is on the wrong side of Pandaland for pretty much any zone that isn’t the Jade Forest.  Bag tomorrow.
  • Get the bag from the quests.
  • Wonder what to do now that I’ve achieved my dream of increased storage space.
  • Quest aimlessly, shuffling from Townlong to Dread Wastes, depending on which seems the least agonizing at that exact moment in time.

During the course of 85 to 90, Alexalis encountered two rares, Sele’na and Lon the Bull.  She successfully defeated Sele’na, but lost to Lon.  She had the misfortune of meeting him exactly when everything ever in the area respawned, and that was just way too many mad cows at once.

Speaking of derping, I regularly catch myself referring to her spec as “Windwaker,” even though she’s used that spec for almost all of her 90 levels.  They’re totally similar, am I right?  Right?

Pigses.

Pigses.

Alexalis and Mr. WigglesThere may be a bit more suspicion in this relationship.

Alexalis and Mr. Wiggles
There may be a bit more suspicion in this relationship..

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5 thoughts on “Becoming One With the Derp

  1. Leit

    Krasarang has character, pathos, ties in to the ongoing Celestials/Anduin storyline, and isn’t an extended exercise in playing a farmhand. Valley… has Virmen. Yeah, I’m going to go with KW here.

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Powah Post author

      But think of all the farming tools that would go unrescued if nobody went to the Valley! Think of Chen Stormstout’s unmade beer! THE TRAGEDY!

      I actually didn’t like the whole storyline with Dezco’s wife.

      But I do ❤ me some Anduin, even if Nir did get smashed to pieces by the Sha at the Temple of Chi'ji (or whatever his name is). She had to come back later, when she was bigger and stronger.

      Reply

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