Patch 5.3 Proves that RNG is FOREVER

In the box Therm received as an award for running the “Blood in the Snow” scenario, she got a weapon.  OMG WEAPON, right?  But no, unfortunately, it was worse (OF COURSE) than her upgraded heroic bow.  SERIOUSLY, RNG? I MEAN COME ON!  STOP RUBBING MY WEAPON PROBLEM IN MY FACE.

They say they’ve instituted bad luck protection (which I sure as hell need) and I wanted to try it out.  So although RNG is clearly alive and well in patch 5.3, I finally got some Mogu Charms of Pain Fate together and queued Therm up for Forgotten Depths.  Tortos gave me gold, so I rolled again and got g … loot?  Wait, I got loot from Tortos?

OMG?  OMG!  WHAT IS IT?  I GOT LOOT!  BOW?  BOW?  IS THAT YOU, BOW?  I’VE BEEN DREAMING OF YOU FOREVER, BOW!

Alas, it was a pair of 502 shoes, which was especially tragic as I had JUST finished the quest that gives you a pair of 502 shoes and was wearing them at that exact moment.

I just don’t even.

I can't even anymore.

I can’t even anymore.

Maybe I should level a class that can use more weapons.  Maybe I should invent a class that can use ANYTHING as a weapon!  I’m not going to disenchant or vendor those greens.  I’m going to use them as projectiles for a cannon!  Yeah!  CLEARLY this is the way to go.

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5 thoughts on “Patch 5.3 Proves that RNG is FOREVER

  1. Leit

    Do you read Goblins? One of the major characters has the ability to use pretty much anything as a weapon. He traded his ability to rhyme on purpose for it. (yeah, it’s an odd comic if you’re not into d&d)

    In actual d&d, there was a brawler class that had the natural ability to use anything as a weapon. Literally anything, and it did damage according to size, so a handkerchief was as effective as a dagger and a size small character was as good as a greataxe. What I’m saying here is, give us a class that lets tauren swing Blood elves around.

    Meanwhile, I tried PvP pet battles this weekend. Conclusion: RNG sucks, and Blizzard’s RNG is a bad joke.

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Powah Post author

      I haven’t read it, and although I’m not into D&D anymore, trading an ability to rhyme on purpose makes PERFECT SENSE to me.

      If a goblin swings a Tauren – is that goblin swinging a nuke?

      Reply
  2. Pingback: I Give Up (on Tokens, Not in General) | That Was an Accident!

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