Part Three: The Real Lei Sheeyit

When it comes to fighting the Twins, I have a mental image of the guild hunter as some sort of well-armored ballerina, dancing out patterns that, if you look real close and squint hard, might actually resemble the Celestials.  He is dancing with precision and grace, but if you didn’t know what shape he was making, you’d be at a loss.

But enough of interpretive dance.  Let’s speak of Lei Shen, the guy who has no shirt and no shoes but expects service from the Zandalari anyway.  We intrepid adventurers went in to free the Zandalari of his oppressive regime for blood, guts and glory.  And gold.  And gear.

Right In The Middle With You From this platform, Lei Shen makes it rain in the Isle of Thunder.  Good job, Lei Shen.

Right In The Middle With You
From this platform, Lei Shen makes it rain in the Isle of Thunder. Good job, Lei Shen.

You know what freaks me out the most about Lei Shen, regardless of mode?  It’s how the freaking teleporter pad thing puts you RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE of his platform.  Of course, the middle is better than the edge, since that’s where HE is … but it just feels so exposed, like he might just turn around, go “WELL HELLO THERE,” and shock the sheeyit out of us all.  Fortunately he, like every mob ever, suffers from extreme near-sightedness.  (Next big market for goblins: mob optometry.)

In LFR, the Lei Shen sequence feels something like this, with arrows indicating a period of movement:

↑ THERE WENT A HEALER → BATTLERES ON THE TANK PLEASE ↓ CAN WE GET A BATTLERES ON THE TANK PLEASE ← JEEBUS HOW MANY WARLOCKS AND DRUIDS DO WE HAVE WHO AREN’T PAYING ATTENTION ↑ GO TO YOUR MARKER → STACK ↓ etc.

You basically pray that the tanks know what the hell they’re doing with this whole conduit business, and follow them around the square until the intermission/one section of the platform blows/etc.  It’s a certain kind of chaotic, but it has a predictable pattern.

In normal, the Lei Shen sequence (for me, at least) seems something like this:

→ ← ↑ ↓ → ↓ ↔ ↑ ↓ OW → ← ↑ ↓ → ↓ ↔ OH GOD THAT HURT ↑ ↓ ↔ WTF → ← ↑ ↓ → ↓ ↔ ADDS → ← ↑ ↓ → ↓ ↔ CRAP UM WELL REINCARNATION’S STILL GOT AN 11 MINUTE COOLDOWN

A Rare Shot Trust me, they're hard to come by.  If there's something I can stand in, I'm already dead there.

A Rare Shot
Trust me, they’re hard to come by. If there’s something I can stand in, I’m already dead there.

Seems similar, but while you don’t have to worry about the tanks knowing their sheeyit, following them around the square is a completely different ballgame.  You must stack, but you GOTTA spread out.  STACK!  Move away!  You can’t be so close because adds pain bad ow help death. STACK NO BAD STACK MORE GO AWAY STACK SPREAD STACK it’s like some sort of … weird interpretive dance, actually, with potentially fatal consequences if you fail to perform the attraction/repulsion routine just right.  I think we had to take seven or eight shots at it in all before we managed to ground the guy permanently (for the week).

Dear Lei Shen This is why having friends is good.  They can kick ass for you when you are dead.

Dear Lei Shen
This is why having friends is good. They can kick ass for you when you are dead.

Since this was my first time defeating being part of a group that defeated the “real” raid version Lei Shen, I achieved:

Does This Feat Make Me Look Legit?

Does This Feat Make Me Look Legit?

Does this make me legit?

I credit the others for 97% of it.  The last 3% would be my own efforts that, while useful, were comparatively miniscule.  I don’t FEEL like a “real raider,” at least not yet.  (Maybe repeat exposure helps?)  Having the feat seems somehow surreal, as though I were some sort of dream-observer, watching from a different plane.  This could be due to all the time I spent dead.

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14 thoughts on “Part Three: The Real Lei Sheeyit

  1. khizzara

    Woot! Grats on your Feat of Strength! You’re in the big-time raider club now! 😀

    Which means you have to STOP HAVING FUN. IMMEDIATELY. This is serious business, don’tcha know? 😛

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Powah Post author

      Why thanks! Still, some things don’t ever change. I have to leave my mic on mute most of the time, because otherwise I’d overwhelm the raid with:

      EeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee
      SHEEEYIT
      FOR GAWD’S SAKE
      DAMMIT
      OW OW O CRAP
      WHY AM I ALWAYS DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD

      Reply
  2. tomeoftheancient

    Congratulations! But oh no, now that you’re in the big-time I hope that doesn’t mean your posts will be all serious business filled with solemnity and theory-crafting. Say it ain’t so!

    Reply
    1. Prinnie Powah Post author

      Are you familiar with “lorem ipsum” text? It’s a dummy text that folks in graphic design/layout/etc. professions use to fill in spots where text should be. It essentially is a bunch of solemn Latin gibberish. That is what theory-crafting and stat type posts tend to read like for me.

      So somehow I doubt I’ll ever pass the threshold of competency required to type like that.

      Reply
      1. Leit

        Not that you’d use it for anything less complex, of course… *cofrocketcamelscof* 😀

        Grats on AotC. My guild’s still dead in the water, so still have yet to see the last few fights. Don’t discount your contributions completely – it’s quite hard to carry a healer, as far as we’ve found. 😉

        Reply
        1. Prinnie Powah Post author

          Lorem ipsum dolor sic amaaaaazing rocket camels, right here right now! Next on the list: rocket sha mounts.

          I, er, wound up being DPS for the last segment of ToT. So, uh …

          Reply

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