Questions by Talarian! Answers by Prinnie!
1. What is your favourite game mechanic?
Wait, you mean he’s not a mechanic?
The thing is, what made Thok awesome wasn’t mechanics, but the fact that he was a gigantic freaking dinosaur of bitey, exploding-meat-pile murder. Mechanics became immaterial. Lore no longer mattered. I guarantee that if you replace every orc in Blackrock with an enormous t-rex holding swords in its tiny hands, the awesomeness level of the raid will increase tenfold.
2. Is there a character did you think would be cool when announced or first encountered, but in practice turned out terrible? Who? Why?
Princess Zelda in Ocarina of Time.
This was, I kid you not, the second video game I played (the first being A Link to the Past). I got emotionally invested in it, and as a result things that scared me REALLY scared me (see: Shadow Temple ogawd this place is messed up). Things that annoyed me REALLY annoyed me (see: fire keese, must snipe every last one of those freaking @#$%ers before I enter the room). I haven’t played the game for years and I STILL have extremely strong memories of how I felt the first time I went through it.
At first, Zelda seemed okay to me. So she sends me on a quest to get these three super-important stone things so that this evil guy Ganon can’t get ’em. Okay, that’s fine. Normally I’d suggest she do this sort of thing herself if she really wants ’em that bad, but she’s a princess, and she’s got princessing to do and pink things to wear. Of course, things don’t go as anticipated and crap happens, so then you gotta go back and forth in time to fix sheeyit. Bad Luck: 1, Zelda: 0 (Link: -5). That’s the way the world works.
I still didn’t hate her until I got to the end of Ocarina of Time, when suddenly, YEARS OF NERDRAEG WERE IGNITED.
SO WE’RE TRYING TO ESCAPE A COLLAPSING BUILDING. I’M GETTING SMASHED BY ROCKS AND FIRE. HER PALE PINK DRESS – A LIGHT TROUBLE-ATTRACTING COLOR – REMAINS UNTOUCHED. NOTHING IS HITTING HER. SCREW YOU, ZELDA.
YOU GET TOO FAR AWAY FROM HER AND DOES SHE RUN TO CATCH UP? NO, SHE PUTS HER HANDS OVER HER FACE AND COWERS LIKE A MORON. I SHOULD JUST LEAVE YOU IN HERE, ZELDA.
HER POWER IS OPENING LOCKED DOORS!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? YOU’RE USELESS, ZELDA.
WHY YOU GOTTA RUN RIGHT PAST A REDEAD, ZELDA!? WHY DOES IT LEAP ON ME AND NOT YOU? WWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYY
I KNOW WHAT’S OVER THERE IN THAT PILE OF RUBBLE, ZELDA, AND IT’S BAD. I AIN’T GONNA CHECK IT OUT. WHY DON’T YOU TAKE YOUR DAINTY LITTLE PRINCESS FEET OVER THERE AND DO IT YOURSELF AND @#$%ING HELL YOU ARE MADE OF CONCRETE OR SOMETHING WHY DON’T YOU MOVE
YES. I KNOW HE HIT ME IN THE FACE WITH HIS SWORD. STOP GASPING EVERY TIME HE DOES. JUST SHUT UP. DO SOMETHING USEFUL LIKE OPEN A DOOR TO GO SOMEWHERE ELSE OR SOMETHING DAMMIT.
Many games passed before I forgave her.
3. If your entire life turned out to be a simulation or part of a video game, would it change your outlook on life? How?
So if it turns out that life has merely been a less adorable version of Animal Crossing …
… I think I’d be depressed.
I could do without the bug collection or my well-appointed Evil Overlord Secret Operations Center in the basement, but the lack of authority bites a bit. I was called Empress by all the neighbors. I lined the path to my house with trees that glowed at night YEAR ROUND and nobody could say a word. That’s power, my friends.
4. What is your favourite colour?
Purple. This fact is so well known by family and friends, they give me random purple stuff as gifts. If they can’t figure out what to get me for my birthday but stumble upon a purple ice cube tray, well – there’s a gift for Prinnie! If Christmas has got them stumped but they found a purple towel in a souvenir shop somewhere, it’s like magic! A gift for Prinnie! Did I need a towel? No. Did I want a purple towel with whatever on it? No. Does it matter? No.
It’s gotten to a point where I tell people some other color in the hopes of avoiding this, but the truth usually comes out in the end.
5. If you were an astronaut and going to space for 6 months, what personal item would you bring with you?
A journal and its associated writing implements, so I could document my slow descent into madness.
Or some cookies.
6. Which of the Seven Deadly Sins is your favourite?
Are you kidding me? GLUTTONY. There is no competition.
7. Is there a moment in your life where you felt you were finally “in the future”? What precipitated it?
I feel like I’m in the future when I talk to people who live in California. THEY LIVE IN THE PAST.
8. Cliffhangers, good technique, or annoying technique? Why?
Depends on how bad the cliffhanger pisses me off and if the next episode is readily available.
9. Has there been a game mechanic that enraged you or felt supremely unfair? What was it and why?
RNG. RNG again. More RNG. RNG still.
Do I even need to say more?
10. Tortoise, or the Hare?
Tortoise, wearing a bunny headband, doing something cute that can be turned into a gif.
QUESTIONS FOR OTHER PEOPLE
- What are your memories of the first game you ever played?
- If someone steps on your toe, what do you do to them?
- If offered a choice between listening to someone chew or listening to someone talk politics for a twenty-four hour period, which would you go with?
- If you could skip any content in WoW, what would it be?
- Wanna make a lowbie alt with me? Somebody told me they redid Blackfathom Deeps.
- Is LFR dead?
- What’s your favorite hobby outside of WoW?
- Out of all the birthday parties you’ve ever attended, which one was your favorite?
- Is there something you secretly hate about your favorite class in WoW?
- If you could magically gain an amazing talent, what would it be/
- Kashina – she needs an excuse to post!
- Rades – because who else would RP walk through Brawler’s Guild fights?
- Garrosh Hellscream – because we’ve all heard those rumors about the parties he’s attended
- Rep – I can haz puppy pictures plz?