Category Archives: Majig

Post-patch acclimatization process initializing.

So I’m slowly spending some time reacquainting myself with the different classes.

Summary for the tl;dr folks:

  1. Thingie lives on, long live Charge
  2. Majig got deleted because of bad totem feelings
  3. Arcane mage/protection paladink feel the same to me as they did before
  4. I need Shadowstep back, but level 60 seems so far away
  5. OMGWTF I HATE HATE HATE abilities that are under 15 seconds especially if you have to keep them up
  6. “Choice” is crap, there’s still a set of talents that “should” be chosen
  7. Where’s the Shadow talent choice at level 90 add one soon plzkthx
  8. Screw the standard Shadow talent build, I want my Shadowsquid

The Good Parts:

Caliverne nearly had a heart attack when I told him I was considering deleting a fellow warrior, but thanks to the patch, Thingie survived The Purging of the Alts.  Warriors got Titan’s Grip at a super low level and now rage regeneration feels easier (once I was reminded that I should probably use a Stance and all).  I also remembered that I really like Charge-ing into things, even though I do sometimes get a little Charge happy and Charge into the wrong mobs across the room.

Centina’s now up to 70.  Prior to the patch, people kept on complaining that now Arcane mages will have to hit a grand total of three buttons OMFG.  Maybe I’ve been a screwup as a mage, as I was always hitting three buttons or more.  In any case, it mostly seems the same as before, except I can’t tell what the hell causes Arcane Missiles to pop (sometimes I can just keep on smashing Arcane Blast forever la la la), and sometimes I get two shots of Arcane Missiles for no apparent reason.  This, however, is not something I feel mad about.  FIRE ZE MISSILES!*

Niremere has no idea how lowbie protection tanking is different now.  For her, it’s exactly like it was before.  Run in, smash things in face with a shield, smash more things and Judgementize them, yell at the huntard/priest/mage who insists on shooting the next mob before you pull the mob yourself, rinse, repeat.  Also, how many bad euphemisms/puns was Blizzard knowingly making when they created that glyph where you get a buff if you mount up?

The Iffy Part:
I’ve been leveling Bombelina because OMFG BOXES HELP ME BOXES EVERYWHERE I couldn’t unlock the boxes I was picking up, and that was the whole damn point of this rogue business.  My favorite thing ever, Shadowstep, is now a talent that I can’t get back until level 60.  I liked that skill an awful lot because I suck at positioning (hence why I often like ranged damage, because my position is simply “far away from the thing that hurts”).  On the other hand, because I have played her more recently, I seem to be getting less sucky at rogue-ing in general.  I just spend the whole pug pickpocketing anyway.

The Bad Parts:
Why the mother trucking @#$% bleeping bleepity bleep bleep bleep are there now so damned many bleeping @#%# skills under thirty seconds, some of which you’re supposed to “keep up at all times”?  If it isn’t obvious by now, I hate it when things that are Generally Useful and/or Need to Be Kept Up are also really stupid short.  Short is okay when it’s a “Save My Ass” skill or talent, but if it’s something you’re using all the damn time?  Annoying as @^#$.

Take shamans, for example.  Once upon a time, shaman totems lasted a grand total of thirty seconds to however many minutes.  It was possible to glyph them so they lasted longer, and you damn well better believe that I did.  My only issue was that although you got four “sets” that you could set up and summon, you couldn’t label those sets, which in turn made it somewhat difficult to remember which same-looking icon was which bunch of totems.

Blizzard decided to solve this totem complexity issue by making totems into mostly non-buffs that last fifteen seconds or so.  They have specific situational uses, that is, pray to God your situation lasts fifteen seconds or less (or that you’re not fighting in the same spot for more than fifteen seconds).  Fightin’!  Lemme throw down this totem.  Fightin’!  Oh wait.  Gotta do it again.  Fightin’!  Wait.  Totem time!  I’d rather just not use totems at that rate, but the reason I made a goblin shaman in the first place was because I really liked the way goblin totems looked.  Also, /sadface in that you only toss down one totem or two, because I liked having all the awesome looking totems around me.  Yeah, I deleted Majig.

I’m also feeling pissy about similar timing changes made to shadow priest skills.  For example:

Shadow Word: Pain lasts 18 seconds.
Vampiric Touch lasts 15 seconds.
Devouring Plague lasts 6 seconds.

You’re supposed to keep Pain and Vampiric Touch up all the time.  (In addition, Mind Flay no longer resets Shadow Word: Pain.)  #$% my life.

The new setup to “provide players with the flexibility to choose certain talents without backlash” is a bunch of pretentious game designer bullsheeyit; it sounds nice when you say it and nice when you plan it, but it isn’t actually true in practice.  DPS bean counters and number aficionados have, of course, already figured out The New Standard, and there is, of course, only one New Standard (unlike the one and a half there was before when there were ninety million talents).  Are you really free to choose any talent?  Yeah, right, since you need to choose certain ones for your DPS – your reason for existing.  (Also, why is there no Shadow variant for the level 90 tier?  FAIL!)

You know what Ailabeth says?  Eff it.  Eff it all.  She is keeping her Mindbender Shadowsquid.  It’s not like I was ever top DPS in the first place or even anywhere close.  I’ll take my “Passive Aggressive Mana Management” scheme and just make it a “Passive Aggressive Low Damage Justification Because I Want My Shadowsquid Dammit” scheme.

*(But I am le tired!)

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Character Futures and Stuff

I wanted full body shots in different poses for the character profile pages I have up, so made new images.  I wound up not using shoulders for most, because my ModelViewer sometimes does strange things – and at the time I was fiddling with these, shoulders were showing up Tauren-sized on everybody.  I didn’t think it looked too bad on Thermalix, given the pose I went with, but for everybody else?  It just looked dumb.

I’m also taking a moment to sit down and make a kinda sorta plan for what I intend to do with the dramatis personae come Pandaland.

Mechalis

Mechalis

Quote: “Wanna purchase a Rocket Camel?  It’s totally legal on all four continents although some faction exceptions may apply!”

Will She Survive Pandas: Yes.  She doesn’t care about pandas, unlesssss she can put a rocket or two on them and see how aerodynamically they behave when launched.  Don’t worry, she’ll make sure there’s a trampoline they can land on.  What?  It’s perfectly safe.

Future Plans: As my primary melee DPS, Mech will likely be among the first of my gals to make it to 90, for those times when things need to be smashed.  I am certain that there will be smashing times ahead.

Thermalix Spendtrue

Thermalix

Quote: “I soooo did not mean to shoot that.”

Will She Survive Pandas:  Hell yes, ain’t no panda nowhere gonna take her down no way no how!  Also, ENORMOUS ROCKET MOUNT MUST HAVE.

Future: Thermalix is the only one who has clear goals for the expansion.  She will probably be the first to make it to 90, as my inner hunter pet collector will kick in (again) and I will need to tame a Purple Armored Stone Quilen, and a White Porcupine, and a Goat of some color, and a Green Fen Strider (or maybe a white one!), and a Black Crane, and a Raven, and a Ghost Saber Worg, and and and!  Yay!

There are only two depressing things for Thermalix in this: you can’t tame color changers any more (thank God she got her color changing scarab already), and she really, really wishes they’d increase the stable space to allow for more pets.  Thermalix is going to have to let some of her darlings go, and that’s always a tough call.

Centina Dollarbender

Centina

Quote: “The sky is falling!  The sky is falling!”

Will She Survive Pandas: Yes, providing no panda hits her.  If one does, she’s probably going to get one-shotted.

Future: She will inch towards the new level limit (providing she ever reaches the old one), forced to do so by her fondness for leveling tailoring in order to get rid of all the fabric scraps she hoards.  When her bank is full, it’s time to level tailoring.  When she can’t level tailoring, it’s time to level herself.  While dungeoning, she’ll pick up more fabric.  It is an endless cycle.

Bombelina Sparklefuse

Bombelina

Quote: “I’ll just spend this whole pug pickpocketing.  I’m sure you don’t mind.”

Will She Survive Pandas: Yes.  I want my own lockbox opener, dammit.  Also, she only has one transmog outfit to her name, and that’s just friggin’ sad.

Future: She will be forced to level so that she can open up the high level lockboxes the others keep sending to her.  They’re really starting to stack up!  As my only leather wearer, she’s also going to have to level so she can represent.

Thingie Goldwasher

Thingie

Quote: “No tanks!  No tank you.”

Will She Survive Pandas: Maybe.

Future: I’ve been debating deleting Thingie, and I’ve been debating making her a monk once Mists comes.  So far, her saving grace against both these fates has been her current ability to dual wield Shovels of Mercy.  If the human and the orc in that video had Shovels of Mercy, that panda would’ve had a far tougher time.  There will be no tanking for Thingie, so I foresee a lifetime of long queues, which is kind of depressing.

Majig Goldwasher

Majig

Quote: “I’m having an issue with some yetis.  Can I call you back?”

Will She Survive Pandas: I don’t know.  In fact, I don’t know what happened with playing a shaman.  It was fun, once, but now I just don’t know what I’m doing.

Future: Majig’s future is as tenuous as her sister Thingie’s.  Maybe I’ll play her for a little while with this new talent system and see how I feel about the shaman class, but as of late it’s been mostly indifference.

Ailabeth Blisswell

Ailabeth

Quote: “There are some ghosts who can never go home.”

Will She Survive Pandas: The question really ought to be, “Will pandas survive meeting Ailabeth?”

Future: Ailabeth will probably be the second to make it to 90, as I enjoy Levitate, Leap of Faith and Shadowform far too much.  Her goal is, more or less, to kill the sheeyit out of things and take their stuff and gold for transmog purposes.

Niremere Lane

Niremere

Quote: “I can only go forward from here.”

Will She Survive Pandas: Yes, although she’s a very long way from ever getting to Pandaland itself.

Future: SAVING THE WORLD.  Handing a huge catfish to King Chin (or possibly slapping him with it.  Is she in a protadin or a retadin mood?).  Daydreaming about marrying him, and using the combined power of the Church and Stormwind’s military to reclaim/make useful again Elwynn and Westfall.  Would insist on being generous with former Defias who agree to take an oath of loyalty and would put pretty much every person ever to work repairing or replacing infrastructure in Westfall because Being Nice and Doing Good Works is all for the Light.  Retaking Stromgarde Keep, because seriously, guys, after Lich King + Deathwing + Serious High Level Stuff, you’re really letting some lowbie rogues and ogres sit there and hold it?  The Horde will take it if you don’t do something!  Nir wants to do something!

She Seeks Redemption

Please excuse me while I go jumping around.  The WOW Factor Competition is coming to WRA on the 25th – even better yet, it’ll be Horde-side!  I don’t stand a chance in hell, but I swear to God I’m going!  What time is it?  Er, haven’t figured that out yet, but I’m so going.  (Cue the teenage angst!  Please, God, don’t let anybody wear the same dress I’m going to wear.  That’d be sooooo embarassing!)

The girls had quite a fight to decide who would represent us all at the event.  Thingie and Bombelina were smart and bowed out early on, while Mechalis flirted with the idea but never really committed.  Majig was knocked out of the running by an elbow to the face, which left Thermalix (who, coincidentally, has very pointy elbows), Centina and Ailabeth.

THE HORROR

THE HORROR
OH GOD WHAT’S GOING ON

While Centina had the popular vote to back her up, she underestimated her Forsaken competition.  Her overconfidence was perhaps to be expected as Ailabeth did, after all, utterly fail at even placing in the last thing she entered.  Ailabeth was not to be deterred by such a thing, however.  She summoned her Shadowfiend, Levitated herself and went into Shadowform, then chased Centina down and terrorized the living bejeesus out of her.  Since Centina likes to sleep at night, she ceded the match.

It was then down to Thermalix and Ailabeth.

Ailabeth made the very important point that she was more likely to be taken seriously, as she wasn’t short and green.  Thermalix called that heightist, and fought back by stating the obvious: she’s level 85 already and has way more options.  (She could also match her pets to her transmog!)  The conversation devolved into personal insults for a brief period of time.  Thermalix was very glad she was wearing goggles, as it looked like Ailabeth would enjoy nothing more than gouging out her eyes, probably with her sharp pointy bony fingers.  Ailabeth then said, “I will plague you for this!”

To Thermalix, it was unclear if she meant “annoy to an extreme degree,” or, equally likely, “you remember that plague that killed me?  Yeah, let’s try it out on you.”  Thermalix thought about it, and decided to opt for caution.  After all, she’s a goblin, and self preservation is a virtue!

To give you, the reader, some perspective on how strong Ailabeth’s desire to bring her A game to the competition is: she actually spent four hours PvPing in random battlegrounds for honor points.  Yeah, you read that right.  I won’t pvp for love nor money, but I sure as hell will PVP for transmog gear.

“Neutral” Set, or “I Couldn’t Afford the Rest of the Lord’s Set” Set

I completely forgot to post this.

"Neutral" Set

“Neutral” Set, or
“I couldn’t afford the rest of the Lord’s set” Set

Class: Shaman, Huntard

Helmet Not Shown | Crusader’s Pauldrons | Spirit Cloak | Lord’s Breastplate
Prankster’s Fingers | Lord’s Girdle | Banded Leggings | Bootscuff Boots

Status: Not Done
To Find: Prettier weaponry as always

Thoughts: Here’s Majig in her first modeling post, showing off the Lord’s Breastplate that Thermalix picked up for a ridiculously low price.  Unfortunately, Thermalix realized that 1.) she herself would never wear it (mostly because whenever she looked at it, she thought “EL OH EL BOOBCUPS”), and 2.) the rest of the set was just too damn expensive for her taste anyway.  So she sent the chest piece off to Majig and told her to have at it.  Majig is, however, much poorer than Thermalix!  Boots and gloves are quest items, while the pants and shoulders were cheaper than the Lord’s variety. The Banded Leggings have the added advantage of actually being pants.  (Majig is in Winterspring, so pants = SURVIVAL.)

In addition, organization!  I can haz it!  I found my Transmoggination Trove page was getting obnoxiously long, so I split it up by armor type, which I probably should have done in the first place.

If the Goblins Were NPCs

So there’s this Blog Azeroth Thing, where Cymre asks what NPC your character would be.

Mechalis as an NPC

YOU! YES, YOU!
You need a rocket camel!

Mechalis would be a Rocket Camel Vendor.  She would fly to different major cities (perhaps one city per week), exploding on the scene and causing mayhem and uproar and attracting lots of publicity, and hopefully making a nice tidy profit once the smoke clears.  She’d have to take one week off every now and then to replenish her supplies, but for the most part, she’d be devoted to sharing Rocket Camels with the world.

Thermalix as an NPC

I’ve looked at the map
I still can’t get out of here

Thermalix would be a secret Quest Giver whom players would normally find lost in a corner somewhere in Dalaran.  If you talk to her often enough, you’ll get a quest where you can offer to escort her safely to the Auction House.  On the way, you will be assaulted by visions of nightmarishly expensive armor and Minigob Manabonk.  If you defeat them all and succeed in showing her the way, you’ll receive some of the engineering crap she’s stored in her bank.  If you’re lucky, you might even get an Explosive Sheep!

Centina as an NPC

I wouldn’t go outdoors in that
But whatever, it’s your dignity

Centina would be a Transmog Specialist.  She’d stand next to the transmog guy in Orgrimmar and critique your outfit loudly and in public.  By critique, she means “inform you that your wardrobe choices need work, and your sense of color is totally … interesting,” and if asked, she’d recommend pieces for you.  This means no one will ever talk to her.

Bombelina as an NPC

If you want me to be there
I’m gonna make you wait

Bombelina would be an optional, rare spawn that shows up occasionally in some dungeon you run way too often to care about.  She would drop a prototype of her latest leather jacket design, made for those moments when you accidentally jump off your flying mount.  They explode upon impact, thereby negating the crushing force of the landing!

Thingie as an NPC

1,000 pelts? I meant 10,000
I like to see you suffer

Thingie would be a daily Quest Giver related to your profession.  She would first ask you to produce 5 of something, which seems reasonable.  The next time you do the quest, she’d ask for 50.  After that, she’ll ask for 500 of the same item.  She would continue this until you are so horribly bored you think the skill up/bag of shiny things isn’t worth it anymore, so you abandon the questline and quit.  Months later, you’ll read a post on a site somewhere, saying that if you manage to survive all her requests, you get an epically shiny, super-duper rare mount.  But she won’t let you continue once you’ve abandoned the quests!

Majig, who hasn’t shown up in the blog in her own right yet, would be that Quest Giver who keeps on walking away from you while you’re trying to read the text, causing the box to close.  It isn’t a glamorous job, but somebody’s gotta do it.

Oh Sheeyit Screenshots: Son of the Posting

Bad Example

Bad Example
Is the “bad example” the eating of cake, or the not sharing of it?

Don't Jump Off Your Dragon

Don’t Jump Off Your Dragon
Mechalis jumped off her dragon in the middle of battle.
That was a problem.

Size Disparity

Size Disparity
Even though Mechalis is wearing a disguise that makes her huge, Mr. Chicken stays the same.

Bunnehs can ride!

Bunnehs can ride!
Dreadly helps Mech get the “Hard Boiled” achievement.
It didn’t occur to anyone to go to Un’goro and then use the damn branch.

One Last Dance

One Last Dance
After this, Majig ditched the staff and picked up some swords.

I have a goblin problem.

They’re gold-grubbing, soul-selling comedy machines and I love it.  I can’t stop making goblin alts.

Once upon a long long time ago in a state far far away, a much younger self started playing WoW as a little undead rogue named Claire.  Unfortunately, I had rolled on a PvP server to play with a friend.  “But Mech,” you say, “why is this unfortunate?  PvP is fun!”  Well, it was unfortunate because some max level Alliance decided to camp my poor level 16 corpse, making it impossible for me to kill plagued bears in peace.  How do you get revenge when you’re dinky and they’re twinky (and way more numerous)?  So I /ragequit the Forsaken and made a Tauren.  Do you remember when Thousand Needles was dry?  I do, because I made my Tauren jump off the plateaus.

VersebelgAnyway, years passed where I did not play WoW.  When I returned (post Cataclysm), I looked at goblins and thought, “Jeebus, their ARMS!”  So I rolled a Troll instead, Versebelg.  (Ailabeth, my Forsaken and mostly forgotten priest, was also created around the same time.)

But then, one day, I made the fatal mistake of rolling a goblin just to see what their starting area was like, and now I’ve gone through their starting area approximately one million times.  This is particularly insane considering you do 100+ quests before you even get off the islands.

My first goblins were the Goldwasher sisters, Thingie, Majig and Mabob.  No, of course their ancestors did not launder money!  Their business endeavors were entirely legal.  Well, mostly anyway …

Thingie

Thingie, who is still around, is the eldest of the three, and the crankiest.  She is filled with rage (this is punny because she’s a warrior!), which she sometimes takes out on monsters by beating the sheeyit out of them.

Majig, the middle sister, started out as a restoration shaman.  She did not last too long in this occupation, as she found it much more satisfying to dual wield sharp pointy objects.  (Perpetual annoyance seems to be a family trait.)

Mabob, the mage, has since gone off on her own (a.k.a. been deleted).  Her rather frequent death rate probably reflected my inherent tendency to either 1.) run up to the monster and smack it in the face, or 2.) stand my ground when the monster runs towards me.  This is not how being a mage works.

Majig

After that, you’d think I had all the goblins I needed.  Wrong!

That’s when I made Mechalis.  I had one goal – be the happiest, most ridiculous damn Death Knight ever, and boy, did I succeed in that regard.  Blizzard’s code apparently agreed, for every minion she summons has a daft name.  Mechalis typically winds up with unintimidating, rather awkward minions like  Wormjumper (he has low standards), Eyeface (he’s got eyes!  On his face!) and Dirtthief (why does he steal dirt?).  She has a soft spot for Mudchewer (teeth are overrated), however, so she lets him stick around.

If it’s silly, has to do with rockets or pool ponies or things that don’t really need an attention span, Mechalis is all for it.  She has no last name, because that whole Scourge thing did a number on her memory.  All she really remembers now are rockets, profit and the comfort of cold, hard gold.  But that’s ok.  When you’re a goblin, that’s really all you need.

After getting Mechalis to 85, I promptly made more goblins.

Bombelina

Bombelina Sparklefuse is a wee rogue, and a cousin of the Goldwashers.  Her goal is, appropriately, to open up all the boxes ever.  Her hair is ridiculously cute.  Did I mention boxes?  Okay, good, because that’s really all she exists for.  That, perhaps, and sneaking around in the awesome way only goblins do.

(Given my tendencies mentioned earlier – smack things in the face, stay put and stab back – I suck at rogues too.  I know this because there have been other Forsaken rogues in my past who never made it past level 16.  I seem to be doing somewhat better this time around, however.)

And I should not forget Centina, hunter and self-proclaimed Miss Bilgewater.  She has no last name, but that’s simply because I haven’t made one up.  Her first pet was a crab, who met his end on the Lost Isles.  Good-bye, Crabcakes.  You were delicious.

Centina

I made Centina for two reasons: 1.) My 85 huntard is a troll, not a goblin, and I’m too damn cheap to pay for a race and name change, and 2.) OMFG color changing spiny raptor only goblins can get yay!  (I named him Kaja.  Never forget Kaja-cola, official beverage of the Bilgewater Buccaneers!  It gives you IDEAS!)

I like being a huntard for several reasons: 1.) I have an excuse when I do something stupid, since I’m not expected to be smart*, 2.) I like classes with pets/companions/things that help me, 3.) I am independent, meaning leveling is not a pain in the ass, and 4.) there are no expectations of saving someone else whatsoever, which is very good since I have a lot of trouble saving myself sometimes.  FEIGN DEATH FOREVER!

I fully intend on going Beastmaster so I can tame a Devilsaur and name it Sharptooth.

 

* This also works in my favor when my DPS is low, since I’m expected to suck.