Tag Archives: elwynn forest

Face, Meet Desk

Thirabel, as you might recall, was once a Night Elf druid whose sole purpose in life was to beardance on Varian Wrynn’s head.  With her goal fulfilled, I realized the only reason I would want to play a druid would be to transmog leather outfits (since I have wearers of all other armor classes), but that’s 85 levels to go for the sake of completionism, and that kinda killed that plan.  [Edited to add: Oops, forgot about Bombelina.  I have wearers of all armor classes, therefore, the druid for transmog purposes would be redundant.]  I eventually concluded that if I was going to have an alt for an Alliance alt (suddenly, my life is like looking into a mirror looking into a mirror), I was going to make this as damn easy as possible and make her a huntard.


Unfortunately, for a second time lowbie space goat, Azuremyst/Bloodmyst Isle is like the Alliance version of Mulbore: it’s kind of tedious and takes a painfully long time to get anywhere.  My general feeling was something like, “I’ve gone through this place once before, and I’ll be damned if I innoculate the owlbeasts again!”  So, despite my hesitations, I sent Thirabel to Elwynn Forest, to live among the humans.  (Reason 1: They have a hunter trainer.  Reason 2: I find  the human quests more interesting than the night elf ones.  Reason 3: Leveling a space goat amongst dwarves seemed insane.)

Upon arrival in Stormwind, poor Thir was immediately stalked by a loony death knight, so she fled town and ran to Northshire Abbey.  Completing the quests there didn’t take much time, and so Thir entered the most difficult portion of her short life – that is, surviving Goldshire.

Goldshire Never Changes

Goldshire Never Changes
Level 8 vs. Level LOLZ!

I’ve begun to realize that you don’t see the Horde hanging out in the equivalent location (Razor Hill) for the lolz, whereas in Goldshire, the Alliance is there and full of lolzing, and that makes your early levels suck.  Goldshire takes “For the Alliance” and does a little transformation, making it “FOR TEH LOLZ!”  The only problem is that the lolz are generally at your lowbie expense.

Some more lolz were had at Thir’s expense and she was feeling a little jumpy, so she decided it was probably safer to live in the woods.  While helping out in the boondocks (otherwise known as the Stonefield Farm), a level 85 male human mage descended next to her from out of nowhere.  He was wearing a diving helmet and riding a rocket.  Given her past experience with human males (stalker, rather upfront commentary on her appearance, gibberish, all around insanity, etc.), Thir pretty much panicked.  Her fight or flight reflex malfunctioned however, so she /waved.

Rocket Mage 01

Rocket Mage 01
He started off with “Greetings.”

The first thing he had to say filled her with dread.

Rocket Mage 02

Rocket Mage 02
That sounds ominous.

As it turns out, the gift was 200g.  I generally don’t like to take without giving something in return (although some folks have cured me of this habit by refusing to accept the pretty rocks, clam meat and whatnot I try to give), so I gave him the linen I was carrying.  When you’re level 10, you can’t offer much!

Face, meet Desk, because:

  1. You walked into Goldshire despite knowing what goes on there, but also,
  2. You assumed the worst about Mr. Mage, and you were wrong.

Flustercluckery Lessens, Urge to Burn Everything with Fire Subsides

Things Have Improved

Things Have Improved
We’re feeling better about this whole Alliance business.

When my first attempt to play Alliance ended in total flustercluckery, I decided I needed to take a far more smashy role in the human realm.  Yes yes, Shadow and even Disc priests can be quite deadly, I know.  But taking a giant mace and crushing all the things (and potentially all the asshats) just feels different, so I remade Niremere into a paladink instead of a priest.  This had the advantage of better armor, a bigger stick sword, and also a chance to pick a better angryface for the poor girl in hopes of looking a little less vacant.  While I like to think that all these things had to do with the peace I then experienced while stomping through the beginning areas, it was more likely thanks to the fact that my cats woke me up at an awfully early hour, and there just weren’t that many assholes awake and/or paying attention at that time of the night.

Hey, maybe this whole Alliance/human starting place isn’t so bad after all.


Forget diamonds. Stupidity is forever.

Oh, wait.  Nope.  Goldshire is still Goldshire.  Let’s just move on.

Gone Back to the Earth Mother

Gone Back to the Earth Mother

While wiling away the hours before the sun rose, I leveled Niremere out of Elwynn, through Westfall and into Redridge Mountains right past Redridge Mountains into Duskwood.  Phew!  One of the things I was amazed to discover: Hogger didn’t always live in the Stockades.  You know, as a Hordie, I always thought he was eternally there.  That’s just what Hogger did, right?  He always hung out in the Stockades and beat up on the random groups foolish enough to enter.  Well, no.  It seems Hogger once had a life (kind of) in the great wide outdoors, and he didn’t just wander down there for the heck of it.  Sorry, Hogger.  I think you’re a bit too dumb to take into custody, but what does a wee little paladink like Niremere know?

That's a Lotta Lore

That’s a Lotta Lore
LORE!  I learnz eet!

Westfall could be described thusly: “OMFG KING WRYNN WTF FORGET THE TRUCKING TROOPS AND SEND SOME TRUCKING MONEY (AND FOOD)!!111!”  Although Niremere has a huge crush on Varian Wrynn because of his impressive angryface (if only she could move her own features so expressively!), he totally had the Defias coming.  (Side note: Defias = DEFY US?  /punny)

Reading up on the zone brings some understanding in that massive expenditures on armies and the like left Westfall reeling, but it doesn’t answer all the questions. For example, sure, Stormwind totally dropped the ball – but what about the Church?  If one of the basic tenets of the Church of Light is compassion – to help those in need – then the whole religious establishment effed up pretty hardcore, especially considering that Westfall is practically on its doorstep.

I’ve done a few dungeons on Niremere now, and oddly, not a single darn one of them has been the Deadmines.