Tag Archives: /wtf

No Shirt, No Shoes, All WTF

Sometimes, like when you’re questing Just Because and you accidentally run into two people out in the middle of nowhere who happen to be wearing no armor whatsoever and are talking about not being afraid of Santa, you just encounter a bunch of things that you can’t unsee.  (Or unthink, for that matter.  Can gnomes even do tha… ?  No.  No.  Bad brain!  BAD!  Stop that this instant!)

The Cat in the Garden of Elwynn

The Cat in the Garden of Elwynn

But onto the newer story (everybody knows just what goes on outside the walls of Stormwind, anyway).

The first time Thermalix completed the shipment for the August Celestials’ work order, she immediately turned her back to the cart to plant new things for Moar Rep.  I didn’t realize that somebody would show up at the ranch to pick up the produce.  I was expecting something more along the lines of the Harvest Moon game series, which has a magical “Shipment” box that you toss stuff in and it gives you money in return.  Magical cart that gives rep?  Suspension of disbelief, I haz it.

So when the Student of Chi-ji showed up to pick up the melons for the aforementioned faction, I wasn’t looking.  I saw the “I just love the sound they make when they explode!” line and had a small “wtf, is that what you’re doing with my carefully tended crops!?” moment before moving on.  I got Things To Do.  There’s virmen in them dere plants, and I gotta shoot ’em!  I’m BUSY!

But then Fel mentioned that the Student of Chi-ji shows up naked.

The idea of somebody picking up melons in their skivvies (or less) was seriously awkward.  Sure, Blizz has to compose outfits for ninety million NPCs, but forgetting to dress the NPCs for the new fancy rep quests?  Couldn’t possibly be true.  I had to know for sure, though, so the next day I waited for the Student to arrive.

I DON'T EVENWhy would you go get farm produce in your underwear?  WHY?

I DON’T EVEN
Why would you go get farm produce in your underwear? WHY?

WELL, I WAS WRONG.  IT’S TRUE.

WAIT, WHAT?I know your sentence wasn't that long, but you lost me.

WAIT, WHAT?
I know your sentence wasn’t that long, but you lost me.

Is this some sort of whacked out Gallagher reference?  Just what are they DOING in that Temple!?  Some kind of crazy watermelon smashing orgy?  Girl, if you gotta wear something, we got SWIMSUITS for that kinda thing.  Don’t go ruinin’ your nice lingerie.

[Edit: At least they armed her.]

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Today is Not a Day for Thinking

When Thermalix and Mechalis submit their “Petition to Address the Dire Lack of Rocket Camels” to Blizzard, they also plan on sneaking in a document or two supporting the addition of some new emotes.  Here’s what they’ve come up with so far, demonstrated (sorta) by Thermalix and Caliverne:

/yarr

/arrr or /yarr

We got the hat.  We got the pants and the shirt.  We got parrots galore!  It’s about darn time we had a pirate emote.  There could also be /ninja.  You could use either one when you are about to steal need loot for transmog purposes.  Yeah, I need those shoulders.  THEY MATCH.

/omg

/omg or /wtf

Especially handy for those who use the Dungeon Finder or LFR regularly.  We’ve all been in those groups where that “Thing You Don’t Do” becomes the “Thing That Idiot Just Did.”  There is clearly a need for an emote to express the frustration and shock one feels at the moment when you realize you have a mage tank!

/derp

/derp

For use when you are the one who has done the “Thing That Idiot Just Did.”  (See: Thermalix, Smart Move #3201: Run up to Helix Gearbreaker in Deadmines Heroic to start a conversation about his fears.)

/rockout

/rockout

While many are fond of the air guitar, Mechalis also suggests we add the air drumset and the air accordion just to keep things varied.  Remember to always play an /encore after your audience /claps!  Show them you appreciate them.  They are armed.

/ragequit

/ragequit

Who hasn’t seen someone do this?  There needs to be an appropriate tantrum animation before you pull the mobs and dump the party.  Then, since everyone else has been appropriately warned, they have time for a quick /omg or /wtf before they die!

p.s., please add /meow too, kthxbye